Why aren't you a Trump supporter?
Last Updated: 24.06.2025 04:10
When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP
I have complete contempt for traitorism
I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”
I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”
I have an acute aversion to scumbags
I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”
It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms
I don’t watch or listen to advertising
I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones
I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t
I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes
I don’t buy bullshit
Why are you a Muslim? Why is it Islam for you and not something else?
If someone works for me, I actually pay them
I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP
I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”
Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.
I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened
I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light
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I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions
authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday
I can read
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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane
Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?
I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”
I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”
I don’t cotton to rapists
I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality
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I have complete contempt for fakery
I can count
EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that
I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”
I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t
A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y
I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard
I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”
I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center
Why do ugly men flirt with girls that are really hot?
When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability
I understand how hurricane paths work
I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”
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I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.
I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup
Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:
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I actually pay taxes
I have a reading level above third grade
I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet
I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write
It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter
I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is
I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t
I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes
I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink
I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”
I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity
I know who the president of Turkey really is
I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight
I see through liars
I took the same Oath and took it seriously
I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee